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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23902036">Breathe</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/pennedbycat/pseuds/pennedbycat'>pennedbycat</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Game: Resident Evil 3 Remake (2020), request fic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 06:16:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,574</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23902036</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/pennedbycat/pseuds/pennedbycat</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jill escapes Raccoon City alone, finding the heliport completely empty after her last fight with the Nemesis. The guilt over Carlos' supposed death haunts her for months. But there does come a day where he resurges. A day where Jill Valentine almost forgets how to breathe.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Carlos Oliveira/Jill Valentine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>88</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Breathe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hey all! This reunion fic was requested by missuprealaaa on tumblr. Thanks so much for the suggestion! Hope you enjoy! If you'd like to request a fic-- AU or canon, please feel free to reach out to me on my tumblr @ pennedbycat. I'm struggling a lot with depression lately, so it's nice to keep my mind busy.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>November 7th, 1998</b>
</p><p><b></b><b></b>Jill stared at the near blank sheet of notebook paper; her head was so busy with thoughts, and yet she could hardly form a full sentence, even if she tried. She scoffed before ripping the page out of her notebook, balling the paper up and tossing it to the corner of her room. Her therapist told her it would be easier for her to deal with what was going on inside her head, if she started a journal. Today, the brunette had only gotten the date on the paper before she called it quits. What was the point? Her thoughts would still be there, regardless if she wrote them down or not. Being the sole survivor of Raccoon City had fucked with her, more so than the Spencer Mansion did. Jill cut herself some slack with the mansion... she had never seen anything like it. But this time she had been more prepared, and she <em>still</em> let everyone down. Brad. Mikhail. Tyrell. <em>Carlos</em>. Her stomach lurched at the mere thought of his name. She had sent him on a suicide mission to retrieve the sample from Nicholai. He was gone and there was nothing she could do about it. After everything he did for her. Jill didn't want to be alive. She didn't <em>deserve</em> to make it out, not without him.</p><p>She brought her knees up to her chest, her breath hissing as tears threatened to spill from her eyes. Her room felt empty. <em>She</em> felt empty. </p><p>"Jill, are you hungry? I made you some soup," came the small voice of Rebecca as she entered the room. The elder officer gave her a look of disinterest, her face stained with tears now, prompting the younger to set the bowl down beside her, a frown tugging at her lips. "Here. You gotta eat something. I know you haven't."</p><p>Jill propped her head up on her knees, watching the bowl as if she was expecting it to move on its own. "Not hungry," she finally spoke, turning her head to stare at the wall instead.</p><p>Rebecca sighed rather heavily. She swore this was a daily routine with her, ever since she found her. Jill had barely enough strength to drive that helicopter away from the city. She had collapsed in front of the wheel and crashed, barely getting out of there alive. She was rescued and brought to a nearby hospital where they tended to her wounds. One of the resident doctors happened to notice the badge hanging on her belt. Luckily for Jill, this doctor had gone to school with Rebecca. The latter was caught up to speed and took the patient back to her apartment upon her discharge from the hospital.</p><p>"You have to keep your strength up," she reminded her colleague with a small smile, and was met with a scoff, but nothing after that. Rebecca sat down next to her friend, putting a hand on her shoulder. Tired, bloodshot eyes met with the medic's eyes, her smile never faltering. "I know it's hard. But... you can't let it beat you." She squeezed Jill's shoulder, "you're the strongest woman I know. If you can't get through this... there sure isn't any hope for me."</p><p>Jill's expression grew soft as she looked at the young woman before her. Rebecca was the youngest out of them all-- and by far the smartest. Yet, she managed to still maintain a level head in the face of danger. She placed her hand over the one on her shoulder, "don't bullshit me. You're way more badass," she finally cracked a smile, and the pair began to laugh for a moment before silence overcame them again.</p><p>Rebecca had let Jill stay with her for as long as she wanted, even going so far as setting her up with a therapist to help her deal with her crippling PTSD. It was the least that she could do. After picking her up from the hospital, it was evident just how messed up she truly was. Jumping at any and every loud sound. How she would fidget with her hands, most likely jonesing to have a gun again. And the emotions. Oh, that poor girl was an emotional rollercoaster. Jill had confided in her that she had lost someone that she cared a great deal for, but never got the chance to say it. That one really weighed on her.</p><p>"You want to be alone?" The medic asked, watching the older girl carefully.</p><p>A part of her wanted to say yes, but a part of her wanted to say no. In the end, it was that overwhelming feeling of hopelessness that made her reach for her friend, burying her face in her shoulder as she wept. Her thin frame rocked back and forth as her sobs violently tore through her body, leaving her nearly hoarse. </p><p>o-o-o</p><p>Another month had come and gone, and things were starting to get a little easier. Jill still had moments where she locked herself away in her room, unable to eat, and unable to sleep, but she was getting there. Chris and the others were well on their way to stopping Umbrella, and there was even a case out against them. She had made a promise to everyone that she would work on getting herself back on track before she even thought about setting off on their investigations, and she was keeping it. The brunette was still staying with Rebecca, who made sure that she stayed on top of her therapy sessions, and her medication. It was well into December now, and the girls had decided to put up a tree, if anything just to give Jill something to do. </p><p>She hung the last ornament, nursing her mug of coffee as she stood back and admired her handiwork. Jill had come a long way than how she was a few months ago. She used to <em>need </em> a gun on her at all times. She didn't feel safe without it. But-- given what she had been through, that was expected, wasn't it? Her gun had become a safety blanket of sorts. And if she didn't have it, she would start to panic. This probably stemmed from the fact that she was nearly defenseless as she tried to escape her burning apartment complex. Sometimes, she'd close her eyes and be right back there, running for her life.</p><p>"Looks good!" Rebecca praised how well Jill had decorated the white tree. Its artificial lights were a broad spectrum of colors, bringing the otherwise dull-looking living room to life. </p><p>The older brunette turned around and spared the medic a small smile, "thanks," she added, taking a sip of her coffee. "Give me some time and I'll have the whole house looking festive." She took great pride into something as domestic as decorating for the holidays. It was something she did with her dad. A memory he kept alive for his late wife, Nikkei. It was safe to say that the holidays meant a great deal to Jill for this very reason.</p><p>Rebecca was about to add something, but she was stopped by the sound of her telephone ringing. "If that's another telemarketer, so help me God--"</p><p>Jill rose a brow in surprise. She <em> almost</em> sounded heated. Maybe she'd get the Miss Innocent to start cursing yet. "Careful, Becca. I think I'm starting to rub off on you," the older laughed a bit, "pretty soon you'll be using 'fuck' as a sentence enhancer like me."</p><p>Though she didn't reply, the medic shook her head with a little smile on her face as she reached for the handset on the coffee table. Her smile faded after a moment, though, not recognizing the number. Maybe it really <em> was</em> a telemarketer. She answered the phone, being greeted by a man on the other end of the line. Rebecca's eyes traveled over to land on her roommate. The caller wasn't selling anything. In fact, it wasn't even for Rebecca. It was for Jill.</p><p>"You've got a phone call. I'm sorry--- I didn't catch your name--"</p><p>Jill had started to walk away, about to head to the kitchen to get herself a refill of coffee. She glanced over her shoulder when Rebecca said she had a phone call, frowning. That was.... strange. No one knew she was there. Well, no one outside her colleagues.</p><p>The medic covered the mouthpiece of the phone, "he said his name is Carlos." She nearly jumped at the sound of shattering glass, peering over at the older girl, whose skin had lost all color. Jill raced for the phone, her heart beating in her ears. She took the phone from Rebecca, who sat on the arm of the couch, watching as everything unfolded. Jill looked sick to her stomach. She answered the phone; and that was when the fidgeting started again. She tapped her trembling fingers against her leg.</p><p>"If this is some sick fucking joke..." Jill's voice was thick, trying desperately to keep her emotions in check. It couldn't be--- could it? How could he have made it out? She took the only helicopter. There had been no time to look for him. The clock was ticking. She had to go. There hadn't been a day that went by that she didn't think about how things could have been different, and where she'd be because of it. </p><p>But it was him. It <em>had</em> to be.</p><p>"<em>Jill, are you still there?!"</em></p><p>Jill Valentine never knew a day would come where she would forget how to breathe. </p><p>o-o-o</p><p>Jill stood out in the cold <em> waiting</em> for him. Her stomach was in knots. Her cheeks stained with tears. Her whole body shaking, having nothing to do with the weather. He had survived, but he had no recollection of it, not until he happened to look over at the patient he shared his hospital room with. Similar to the brunette, the mercenary woke up in a hospital. The nurses told him that he had sustained a massive head injury. Other than that and a few cuts and scrapes, he was in good condition. Unfortunately, Nicholai had also survived. Carlos had been on that same heliport Jill had taken off on, just on the opposite end. It was still far too dark to see. The men had fought for the vaccine and the tussle ended with both of them being knocked unconscious. The "supervisor's" client had come to bail him out of the city, only to stumble across Carlos as well. Said client happened to be a member of the U.S. Military, one whose dealings with Umbrella had almost killed his entire family. So, he hired Nicholai to work against the pharmaceutical company. This guy wasn't <em>bad</em>, so he couldn't find it in himself to leave Carlos behind, even though he clearly worked for the company he was trying to destroy.</p><p>The mercenary spent months after his discharge looking for Jill. As soon as he woke up, she had been the first thing on his mind. Imagine his rage when he saw an unconscious Nicholai hooked up to all kinds of machines. He had knocked his lights out, and the bastard deserved everything he got. After his mandatory overnight stay at the hospital, Carlos left in search for <em>his </em>supercop. God willing, she was alive and well. He didn't bother keeping tabs on his subordinate, as the U.B.C.S. soldier didn't really give a shit. He had a one track mind, and he wasn't going to stop until he found out that she was okay.</p><p>He paid for someone to do some digging for him. He was given numbers, addresses, anything that might help him find out where Jill was. But many of them were out of service, as they went out with the explosion in Raccoon City. During his last ditch effort, he got a lead. He started contacting hospitals within the area, thinking maybe, just <em>maybe</em> he'd get something there. And he did. A woman matching Jill's description had been hospitalized in the next city over from him, and had been released after a few weeks. He worked tirelessly, calling every number the yellow pages had to offer for that particular city. Most of the people were understanding when he got the wrong number, but he did run into quite a few assholes. </p><p>A car pulled into the driveway and suddenly, Jill forgot how to breathe again. This was <em>real</em>. He really was alive, and he had searched high and low for her (for the <em>second</em> time now). Her hands itched for something to do, so she just shoved them in her pockets, doing her best to ignore her trembling frame. Her heart thundered loudly against her chest as the door opened. And out he came, slamming the car door shut. </p><p>Their eyes locked and Jill had to count to ten as she came closer, steadying her breathing. At this point, she felt as though she was right back in Raccoon. She was trembling like a leaf as she approached Carlos, reaching out to cup his shoulders. </p><p>He hardly recognized her. Her eyes were dull. She looked frail and weak. It was eerily similar to how he found her when she was infected. "Jill-- are you okay?" He wanted to gather her up in his arms and shield her from the world. Because it looked like the whole world was against her right now. Or, at least, he was sure that was how she felt.</p><p>"I'm alive," she managed to chuckle, unable to take her eyes off him. She didn't even want to blink. He might be gone if she did. "Guess I'm just shocked to see you, is all." </p><p>Carlos hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to proceed. He stepped a little closer, putting a hand on her lower back. Jill welcomed this touch, but desperately tried to keep the tears at bay as she reached up to cup his face in her hands. She never had time to process how much Carlos meant to her, not until it had been too late. But now... it was as though they got a second chance.</p><p>"I'm right here. I told you-- I can't leave you in a Carlos-less world. That would just be too cruel," a tiny grin crept up on his face, pulling her close against his chest. She continued to shake as he held her. He swiped some of her hair away from her forehead, kissing her temple gently. He was scared to squeeze her too tight; she might break if he did.</p><p>The ironic part was that it had been cold and cruel living without him. Although she wasn't going to admit it, she was fairly sure that it was obvious. Jill peered up at Carlos, cursing to herself as she felt the tears slide down her face. "Let's go inside," she told him, pulling away from his embrace and using her sleeves to wipe away her tears, praying that-- if he saw her crying, he wouldn't mention it. </p><p>They didn't get too far from each other for the rest of the night. Jill formally introduced her roommate to Carlos and the three of them had dinner together. After a while, the brunette was curled up in <em>her</em> mercenary's arms, slowly dozing off on the couch. The last thing Carlos remembered while he was dozing off himself was Rebecca draping a blanket over the pair. </p>
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